Stars Shine Brightest In The Darkest Night

I'm not a fan of darkness. It implies fear of the unknown, fear of losing your way, no light to see by. I hate the dark. A lot goes on in the dark that without light, it's hard to distinguish what 'that noise' was. But, there are some things I like about the dark. No, I still hate the dark, but I could not enjoy the stars at night if the sun was out. Because of the darkness, I can enjoy the stars, for they are beautiful, and the darker, the better. I look at the stars and am constantly in awe of how big our God really is. I'm amazed every time I see the stars. A beautiful sight, and it doesn't cost a single penny to enjoy God's creation in such a marvelous display!
But yesterday I was reflecting on some of my past and I am still amazed at how great God's grace is! There are 'dark' times in my life I wish I could go back and erase. Situations that were out of my control and I wish had never happened. I KNOW it wasn't God's will for some of the things I faced to happen, but instead of letting it go to waste, God used it to make something beautiful out of it! I stand amazed so MUCH because of how far He's brought me! I was thinking back on a certain situation not of my own making when I was young and although it was a lonely time, a 'dark time', a time of tears and unhappiness, no friends and no one to talk to, God used it to do something in my life that I thought would never be. People told me I would never BE anything and would never DO anything and it was very discouraging. I tried hard to pray, not understanding why people felt that way and why they felt they had to tell me. It was a dark time to me. Now, the amazing thing is, when I think back to that time, yes, I remember the loneliness and the hurt, but I remember the 'shining stars' better! All I can think about was what God did in my life at that point and the hurt and loneliness is a faint memory. It was during this time, when I had been told I would never be or do anything, that GOD Himself began to teach me how to play the piano! I loved going to the malls, but at that point in my life, I was DESPERATE to forgo the shopping excursions just so I could be at home alone, to play and sing to my hearts' content! It was my time of service and praise, since I wasn't allowed to go to church at the time. That was MY church time! I didn't see it then, but looking back, I see how God was carrying me, even though I didn't feel like He was. I felt like I was struggling, trying to make sense of all the confusion in my life, but 'now I see how He was there for me' (words to the song "I never would have made it) and carried me! So, although the loneliness was there and the darkness was there, when I look back at that time in my life, all I see is the STARS, not the darkness. I wouldn't see the stars if it hadn't been so dark.
So, as much as I hate darkness, I try not to focus on it because that's when stars shine the brightest.
I never would have dreamed I would be where I am today. Most people might look at me and not see much, and that's okay. I know where I come from and where HE brought me from, and believe me, I am doing things and going places I thought I would never go or do!!!! There have been many dark nights in my life, but God in His mercy, wisdom and grace, has not allowed them to go to waste, but put some stars there to remind me He was there and He carried me! So when I reflect back on past troubles and trials, I don't see the pain, hurt and loneliness.

I see STARS.